Tag Archives: life lessons

Child Safety, Discipline, Motivation, SYN Digital Enrollment Director

Teaching Kids Responsibility

Parents want to help their kids be successful, but often fear they’ll teach them the wrong things, or teach them in the wrong way. Luckily, responsibility is something that can be taught by example and explanation as much as by enforcement of rules.

 

Learning Responsibility by Example

Parents are the best models for their child’s behavior, especially in the earliest years of development. They should express earnest interest in chores and go about their business without whining or frowning. Seeing shows of good humor alongside chores will help children associate responsibility with positive rather than negative feelings.

It is also beneficial to invite children to help with household chores and other responsibilities. This interaction helps them understand what to do, as well as reinforcing a positive aspect to the responsibility.

 

Learning Responsibility by Explanation

Kids want approval. They want to behave. They want to do well in the things their parents want them to do well in. If they act out or misbehave, there’s always a reason. Sometimes that reason is frustration born of the fact that they don’t know how to behave correctly.

That’s why explanations are so important. Sometimes it’s not enough to just show kids how to behave responsibly. Many times they don’t understand why a task is important, or perhaps even how to do that task correctly. In either case, explanations are crucial.

A child who not only understands how to do something, but why they should do it is a happy child. Children who misbehave, especially young ones, often don’t know why what they have done is wrong. If they learn how to correct their mistakes, they will most likely do so.

 

Learning Responsibility by Enforcement

Sometimes, of course, kids just won’t live up to the expectations placed upon them. At this point, parents must guide them to good behavior through enforcement of consequences for failures in responsibility.

Of course, parents should also make sure to give positive reinforcement for success. However, they should be wary of providing rewards too early on in a child’s development. Responsibility must be seen as an end in itself, not as an avenue to ulterior benefits.

 

In the End

Responsibility is a matter of modeling good behavior for one’s children. It is also a matter of explaining that behavior, and enforcing the consequences of that behavior, for better or for worse.

Bullying, Child Safety, SYN Digital Enrollment Director, SYN The Bully Expert

Lessons learned from my childhood bully

Hello, my name is Ed and I’d like to share with you a story from my past about dealing with bullies.

When I was in the 6th grade, I had a bully named Dave who would put me down and pick on me every chance he got. He was particularly good at saving his biggest insults for when there were as many other students around as possible.

That of course only compounded the hurt and humiliation that Dave had become so adept at hurling my way. Until one day something changed.

 

Know thy enemy

My parents knew that I had been getting picked on. They also happened to know Dave’s parents.

As it turns out, Dave’s home life wasn’t all that great and my parents assured me that he wasn’t focused on me because of any issue he had with me, but because I presented an easy target for him to turn his frustration out on.

Of course, I didn’t think that fact was helpful to me at all. It’s not like I could change the way he was being raised. It took me a little while to figure out, but I realized that while I couldn’t change the cause of his bullying, I could change myself so I wouldn’t be such an easy target.

bullying

 

 

Finding the strength

One afternoon as class was letting out for the day, I found myself alone with Dave in the classroom. I frantically tried to gather my things and slip out the door before he noticed this too, but to no avail.

He began walking over to me.

Afraid of what he would do with no one around to help me, I knew this was my time to change his perception of me or face a potential beatdown. As he approached, I stood up and before he had the chance to say anything I took the initiative and finally confronted my bully.

In a firm, loud voice I asked him what exactly it was about me that made him choose me as his target. I still remember what I said.

“Is it because I’m short? Sorry, but I can’t control that. I don’t wear glasses so that can’t be it. What is it? Why do you pick on me?”

And for the first time, he turned around and walked away without a word.

 

What I learned

It took me a while to realize but appearances truly can help or hurt your cause. There was nothing I could do about being shorter than my classmates but standing up, speaking assertively and having a preplanned practiced response put my bully on his heals.

Dave never bothered me again and I learned a lesson that holds true regardless of age; if you don’t want to be a victim, don’t look like one.

Discipline, Life Lessons, Motivation, Parenting, SYN Digital Enrollment Director

Teaching Children About The Importance Of Charity

Mark, guest contributor

Charitable giving is one of the noblest acts a person can do. There is joy in giving and only those who give happily understand this.

Usually we can watch and hear news in the media screaming about increase in crime and acts of selfishness all day long, while there are also many awesome benefactors in the world who strive to help their fellow men, but those are stories that rarely make it in the media, unless the donated amount is obscene.

It is therefore, dare I say it – obligatory for this generations parents to teach by example to their kids about the advantages of helping other people through acts of charity.

Unlike Mathematics or English, charity is not a life lesson that translates to a specific curriculum. Teaching your children about charity is not as easy these days where all the value seems to be on having more and better and newer things, and thus requires discipline.

There are several ways you can teach your children how to be charitable without having to focus on negative things that could leave the child disinterested.

 

Donating clothes

Once in a while take some time to go through the closets in your home and fish out clothes that you no longer wear or need. These clothes can be given to a children’s home or go to the needy.

When you are doing it, encourage your child to do the same. Allow them to let go of old toys they no longer play with. For the maximum effect, be there with the children while they do it and make sure they are aware of the difference they will make.

Encourage them to let go of the items they could really be attached to, explaining the impact they could have on someone else’s life. Take your child with you to the charity where you will drop your stuff, and if at all possible make sure your child actually sees the difference that their toys can make in the life of another child.

 

Helping the neighbors

It is advised that you regularly engage in service oriented projects. Rake leaves out of the elderly couples backyards. Bake cookies and cakes for the people that bring you mail, milk or other deliverables, it will make their day.

You could also make food and take it to the homeless feeding stations in your community.

 

Donating blood

When going for blood donations, take the children with you. This will cause them to view you as a role model. Talk to them about the reason for giving blood and the importance of it.

 

You can have fun

It doesn’t all have to be about giving up stuff or enduring pain while giving blood. You can also play charitable house lotteries or car lotteries in which you stand a chance to win a house or a car, all the while knowing that, even if you don’t win, your proceeds are going for a good cause.

 

The importance being charitable

These simple acts may seem very minor, but the impact they will have on the child later in life is priceless. This way you will raise children who are sensitive to other peoples’ plights. The children will also value acts of sharing instead of buying into today’s capitalist mindset.

Additionally these acts of kindness will definitely make a huge difference in the society at large. The world will be a much better place for all of us.

——

Mark is a father of two great kids whom he wants to grow up in equally great people, so he teaches them important life lessons while he still has influence on their development.

Child Safety, Family Safety, Life Lessons, SYN Digital Enrollment Director

Knowing Who to Let In and When to Evacuate the House

No matter what your situation is there are going to be times when your teen and even preteen children are going to be left at home.  Sometimes this may be with a babysitter but there will be times when they are just left HOME ALONE. When left alone your children should be “schooled” in some basic safety protocols that include what happens when someone who they don’t know is trying to get into the house and what happens if they are forced for whatever reason to evacuate the house.

Number One: Don’t let unauthorized persons into the house when parents are away. Unauthorized persons are not necessarily strangers.  They may be known to the child but not authorized at this time to be in the house. Your child needs to be given the decision making authority and be provided with the confidence to know that their reasonable decision making will not be questioned. No one gets in without the parent being contacted for permission for that person to enter. This means that you or alternative authority figures have to be available to be contacted by the child, if necessary. A fail safe is a call to 911 with the child saying the right phrase – “My name is … I live at … I am HOME ALONE and someone who I don’t know (or is not authorized) is trying to get into my house. Help Me.”

Number Two: What should you child do when s/he is HOME ALONE and someone is forcing there way into your home? It doesn’t work like the HOME ALONE Movie where the child stays and successfully defends his/her home from the home invaders. Although the child could try to hide, escape detection, and remain safe, the reality is that s/he could be discovered and harmed. The best choice for the child, when properly executed, is to follow a preplan evacuation route from the house, get to a pre arranged place of safety, and contact the police along with the parents. This evacuation plan works for home invasions, fires, and other emergencies requiring evacuation from the house.

The safest choice is not to let an unauthorized person into the house and, if necessary, knowing how to get out quickly to a place of safety while contacting the appropriate people. Talk this over with your kids and role play it – walk through these situations in order to put them in context for your children. This is necessary to make sure that they will respond properly under stress rather that freezing up at the point of impact.

Gary Klugiewicz is employed by http://www.PoliceOne.com as a law enforcement consultant. He is nationally known as law enforcement defensive tactics trainer. He can be contacted at gtklugiewicz@cs.com