Monthly Archives: October 2014

Bullying, Motivation, SYN Digital Enrollment Director, SYN The Bully Expert

How to Help Bullied Children

The elephant in the room today is the bullying and depression experienced by many school children. Bullying has been around for centuries, but in the modern world, the opportunities for even anonymous bullying abound. How can parents help their children if they suspect they are the victims of bullying at school?

There are a variety of opinions regarding the best way to respond to a bully. The old-fashioned way was to hit the bully back. Today, a youngster who responds to emotional or physical bullying at school with retaliatory violence often finds themselves punished. There are several predominant ideas for responding appropriately to a bully:

• Enlist the help of the bully’s parents or a teacher at school
• Travel with other friends instead of being alone
• Seek counseling to find support until the issue is resolved
• Have the victim enroll in a martial arts class to gain confidence in facing large, aggressive bullies

Overall, no one else can force the bully to stop their behavior. There could and should be significant consequences for their actions; however, no guarantees exist that bullies will learn their lesson. Therefore, the focus generally needs to remain with the victim of the bullying.

A child experiencing bullying may exhibit behavior such as unexpectedly crying or bursting out in anger. They may suddenly lose interest in activities that they used to love to participate in. A previously healthy child may complain of aches and pains with no identifiable physical cause. Appetites might change. Grades that were excellent may plummet.

Obviously, any of the above occurrences would cause a parent to be concerned for the well-being of their child. The best defense in this case is an offense of love, concern, attention and a listening ear. The effects of bullying, whether cyber, physical or emotional, can be devastating in a developing youngster.

Bullying and depression do not go away by themselves. If the bullying is occurring on school grounds and officials are not responding in helpful ways, it may be time to find a different education option. If the bullying is online, then perhaps it is time to help the child find other means of communicating with their friends. The most important thing a bullied child needs is continually expressed and demonstrated parental love.

Child Health, Child Safety, SYN Digital Enrollment Director

Your child’s separation anxiety: Is it normal?

It’s not unusual for a young child to feel worried or anxious when being dropped off at daycare or someone else’s home. In most cases, separation anxiety is a normal stage of childhood development. However, in some children, the anxious feelings persist or even intensify over time, causing chronic worries and interference with daily activities.

Fortunately, there are actions that parents can take to help their children.

 

What’s Normal and What’s Not

In children younger than four, reactions such as throwing a tantrum, crying or becoming clingy are natural and expected. What is not normal is a continuance of these feelings or feelings of anxiety that interfere with school and playtime. Intense or chronic separation anxiety are suggestive of separation anxiety disorder.

 

What Are the Symptoms of Separation Anxiety Disorder?

Children with separation anxiety disorder may experience one or more of the following symptoms:

  • An intense fear that something bad will happen to their parent, sibling or another loved one
  • Worries about permanent separation
  • Nightmares about separation
  • Reluctance to sleep, especially if the parent isn’t at home
  • Refusal to go to school
  • Complaints of physical illness such as headaches and stomachaches

 

What Can Parents Do to Help Their Children?

Parents can take action to lessen the symptoms of separation anxiety in their children. One of the first things parents should do is to avoid the triggers that cause the anxiety.

Reducing stress in the child’s life and maintaining a consistent environment and routine help children to lessen their anxiety. Parents can also act to control their own behaviors, as children who observe anxiety in their parents are more likely to become anxious themselves.

Parents can talk about the issue with their children. Listening to and respecting the child’s feelings show the child that his or her parent is aware.

Providing a consistent pattern for daily activities, setting limits about following school and household rules and offering choices about the separation such as bringing a favorite animal or listening to favorite music along the way can help to ease the transition. Patience and self-education about the issue can go a long way in helping parents cope with separation anxiety in their children.

Sometimes professional help is also needed for the child as well as the parent. Counseling, play therapy and medications are some of the treatment options.

 

Bullying, Discipline, SYN Digital Enrollment Director, SYN The Bully Expert

Bullying and special needs children

Children with physical, developmental, intellectual, emotional and sensory disabilities are at an increased risk of experiencing bullying at school and in other public places where they spend time, such as playgrounds and parks.

A child with disabilities may not have the verbal skills to speak up for himself or herself and may be more physically vulnerable to aggressive actions performed by bullies. In addition, some types of disabilities cause a child to become a bully.

Teachers, parents and other important adults in the lives of children with disabilities can come together to identify problem behaviors and work towards a solution.

 

Types of Bullying That Affect Children With Special Needs

Bullying is a power imbalance that occurs between two or more people. In most cases, bullying takes place over a duration of time and often progresses to a worsening level of behavior and actions.

There are many forms of bullying that affect children with special needs, including spreading rumors, cyber bullying, teasing, verbal harassment, racial slurs, taunting, making obscene gestures, threats, spitting, kicking, slapping, punching and hitting. Any of these can happen to a child with special needs who may not understand the context or even why people are doing that to him or her.

 

Rights of Children With Special Needs Who Are Bullied

Children with special needs are protected against bullying, harassment and other forms of intimidation. Under federal law, Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act of 1973 and Title II of the Americans with Disabilities Act of 1990, school systems must address any bullying or threatening behavior exhibited towards children with special needs.

This is true for Head Start all the way through college.

 

Creating a Safe Environment for Children With Disabilities

Schools must provide accommodations for children with special needs.

When bullying takes place, the child must first and foremost be kept safe. Once any medical needs are addressed, the bullying behavior can be considered. Creating a safe environment for children with disabilities may require actions such as amending the IEP, having a meeting with the school counselor and principal, or scheduling supportive services such as psychotherapy or meetings with social workers.

School-wide programs about anti-bullying topics can also be performed as a way to educate the entire school community about this important issue.

 

Focus Attention, Motivation, Self-Esteem, SYN Digital Enrollment Director

4 Steps To Raising Confident Kids

Raising confident kids is not as easy as one might think. There are so many factors that go into nurturing this mindset that it is easy to overthink the process.

The one thing to remember is that parents are their children’s first teachers, and in that regard, they are the ones who reinforce good behavior. So how does that translate into teaching children how to be confident and secure little people?

Here are some tips for doing just that:

 

1. Let them do it.

It is so hard to watch children struggle through something, whether it’s tying their shoes, building a LEGO model or solving a word problem, but it is important that they develop the skills necessary to reason through the problem.

Without their own logical deduction system in place, children will depend on their parents for even the most mundane tasks for longer than they should.

 

2. Scale back the praise.

This may sound cruel, but praise, just like anything else, can feel empty if it doesn’t fit the action.

As children get older, they can tell when they are getting and exorbitant amount of praise for something that doesn’t require it, and they begin to tune it out. This backfires when they do a good job on a difficult task – they may not hear the genuine praise given at the time because they have become desensitized to it.

 

3. Choose optimism over pessimism.

Showing a child that there is a bright side even when they are having trouble helps them to readdress their thinking patterns and reactions to stressors. This is helpful if the child becomes distraught when things don’t go their way.

 

4. Display the rule of choice and consequence.

Letting children make their own decisions is difficult. Parents often feel concerned that their children won’t be happy with the outcome of some of the decisions they make. That is a fact – sometimes children will decide on a course that will disappoint them. But children must learn that their actions have consequences, and the best place to do so is at home.

Instilling confidence in children is one of those difficult parental jobs that continue on for years. Parents play an important role in their child’s future behavior, and by addressing concerns like these early, children have a better chance of adjusting to life’s challenges.

 

Bullying, Discipline, Motivation, SYN The Bully Expert

Addressing Bullying In Youth Sports

Bullying has been brought to national attention due to several high-profile tragedies. Bullying in youth sports has been part of the game for decades. Fortunately, it doesn’t have to be so.

There are many ways that coaches, parents, referees, volunteers, spectators and kids can work together to keep bullying out of youth sports.

 

Educate Parents

Parents must be educated about the effects of bullying on a victim, the victim’s family, and society as a whole. Some parents may not be willing to believe that their child is the culprit or may try to place the blame upon the victim. Involving coaches and sponsors in the conversation can help to ensure that communication is clear.

 

Call Out Negative Behavior

Institute a clear policy that negative behavior is not allowed by anyone in any aspect of youth sports. Bullying may begin with what seems like simple name-calling or teasing about poor performance. However, the situation can quickly escalate if nothing is done.

Nipping negative behaviors in the bud makes it clear that this type of behavior is not acceptable in youth sports. Every youth sports organization should maintain a zero-tolerance rule that applies to:

•Name-calling
•Teasing
•Aggression
•Threats
•Verbal abuse

 

Become Familiar with Bullying Risk Factors

Understanding the risk factors of becoming a bully can help parents and coaches deter the behavior. Many bullies come from homes where such behavior is typical. There may also be domestic violence in the household.

Bullies often have a short fuse and a bad temper. They may use aggression to solve problems both on and off the field.

 

Being Proactive

Parents and coaches can be proactive at keeping bullying out of youth sports. Coaches can make themselves available to parents and players who need to report problem behavior. Parents can be open and honest with their children about reporting problems and setting good examples of how to treat others. Parents can also teach their children the zero-tolerance rule and not go along with others who are bullying.

Youth sports affords kids the opportunity to form strong relationships, be physically active and learn new skills. Eliminating bullying in youth sports requires that parents, coaches and the community work together to set positive examples, enforce a zero-tolerance policy and create an environment in which everyone is welcome.

 

ADHD & Focus, Focus Attention, Motivation, SYN Digital Enrollment Director

Helping Kids With ADHD Succeed In School

A child with ADHD doesn’t need to have difficulty in school. Here are five ways parents can help a child with ADHD succeed in school:

 

Create a routine for the child

Children with ADHD especially benefit from consistent structure.

Wake the child early enough so that mornings are not rushed. Allow time for a balanced breakfast and interacting with the family. Plan an after-school snacktime to refuel the child’s brain before tackling homework. Ensure that the child goes to bed early enough to get sufficient sleep.

 

Reinforce proper school time behavior

It is tempting to allow a child with ADHD to stand while doing homework and not do all the work at once or to zone out when he or she should be focused. However, it is important to replicate the school environment as closely as possible during homework time.

This reinforcement will help the child to understand what is expected of him or her at home and at school.

 

Be a resource, not a crutch

All kids need a little help with their homework every once in a while, but it is important to help and not hinder.

Doing a project for a child is hindering his or her learning. No matter how frustrated or distracted a child gets, it is important that he or she does homework mostly without parents’ assistance. Parents can help explain concepts and review work, but they should let the child work independently after that.

 

Reinforce appropriately

Parents should talk about how well a child solved a problem and praise the work and effort put into it. These are the things a child remembers when he or she works on another problem. It builds confidence and self–sufficiency.

 

Show that you are calm

Understand that children with and without ADHD can lose interest in lessons. Every kid gets a low grade every now and then. Parents should take a deep breath before reacting or getting too worried. This will also help the child not to overreact to a situation.

Parents are integral in helping a child with ADHD succeed in school. These steps will help such a child to be more successful in school.