Category Archives: Motivation

Bullying, Motivation, SYN Digital Enrollment Director, SYN The Bully Expert

How to Help Bullied Children

The elephant in the room today is the bullying and depression experienced by many school children. Bullying has been around for centuries, but in the modern world, the opportunities for even anonymous bullying abound. How can parents help their children if they suspect they are the victims of bullying at school?

There are a variety of opinions regarding the best way to respond to a bully. The old-fashioned way was to hit the bully back. Today, a youngster who responds to emotional or physical bullying at school with retaliatory violence often finds themselves punished. There are several predominant ideas for responding appropriately to a bully:

• Enlist the help of the bully’s parents or a teacher at school
• Travel with other friends instead of being alone
• Seek counseling to find support until the issue is resolved
• Have the victim enroll in a martial arts class to gain confidence in facing large, aggressive bullies

Overall, no one else can force the bully to stop their behavior. There could and should be significant consequences for their actions; however, no guarantees exist that bullies will learn their lesson. Therefore, the focus generally needs to remain with the victim of the bullying.

A child experiencing bullying may exhibit behavior such as unexpectedly crying or bursting out in anger. They may suddenly lose interest in activities that they used to love to participate in. A previously healthy child may complain of aches and pains with no identifiable physical cause. Appetites might change. Grades that were excellent may plummet.

Obviously, any of the above occurrences would cause a parent to be concerned for the well-being of their child. The best defense in this case is an offense of love, concern, attention and a listening ear. The effects of bullying, whether cyber, physical or emotional, can be devastating in a developing youngster.

Bullying and depression do not go away by themselves. If the bullying is occurring on school grounds and officials are not responding in helpful ways, it may be time to find a different education option. If the bullying is online, then perhaps it is time to help the child find other means of communicating with their friends. The most important thing a bullied child needs is continually expressed and demonstrated parental love.

Focus Attention, Motivation, Self-Esteem, SYN Digital Enrollment Director

4 Steps To Raising Confident Kids

Raising confident kids is not as easy as one might think. There are so many factors that go into nurturing this mindset that it is easy to overthink the process.

The one thing to remember is that parents are their children’s first teachers, and in that regard, they are the ones who reinforce good behavior. So how does that translate into teaching children how to be confident and secure little people?

Here are some tips for doing just that:

 

1. Let them do it.

It is so hard to watch children struggle through something, whether it’s tying their shoes, building a LEGO model or solving a word problem, but it is important that they develop the skills necessary to reason through the problem.

Without their own logical deduction system in place, children will depend on their parents for even the most mundane tasks for longer than they should.

 

2. Scale back the praise.

This may sound cruel, but praise, just like anything else, can feel empty if it doesn’t fit the action.

As children get older, they can tell when they are getting and exorbitant amount of praise for something that doesn’t require it, and they begin to tune it out. This backfires when they do a good job on a difficult task – they may not hear the genuine praise given at the time because they have become desensitized to it.

 

3. Choose optimism over pessimism.

Showing a child that there is a bright side even when they are having trouble helps them to readdress their thinking patterns and reactions to stressors. This is helpful if the child becomes distraught when things don’t go their way.

 

4. Display the rule of choice and consequence.

Letting children make their own decisions is difficult. Parents often feel concerned that their children won’t be happy with the outcome of some of the decisions they make. That is a fact – sometimes children will decide on a course that will disappoint them. But children must learn that their actions have consequences, and the best place to do so is at home.

Instilling confidence in children is one of those difficult parental jobs that continue on for years. Parents play an important role in their child’s future behavior, and by addressing concerns like these early, children have a better chance of adjusting to life’s challenges.

 

Bullying, Discipline, Motivation, SYN The Bully Expert

Addressing Bullying In Youth Sports

Bullying has been brought to national attention due to several high-profile tragedies. Bullying in youth sports has been part of the game for decades. Fortunately, it doesn’t have to be so.

There are many ways that coaches, parents, referees, volunteers, spectators and kids can work together to keep bullying out of youth sports.

 

Educate Parents

Parents must be educated about the effects of bullying on a victim, the victim’s family, and society as a whole. Some parents may not be willing to believe that their child is the culprit or may try to place the blame upon the victim. Involving coaches and sponsors in the conversation can help to ensure that communication is clear.

 

Call Out Negative Behavior

Institute a clear policy that negative behavior is not allowed by anyone in any aspect of youth sports. Bullying may begin with what seems like simple name-calling or teasing about poor performance. However, the situation can quickly escalate if nothing is done.

Nipping negative behaviors in the bud makes it clear that this type of behavior is not acceptable in youth sports. Every youth sports organization should maintain a zero-tolerance rule that applies to:

•Name-calling
•Teasing
•Aggression
•Threats
•Verbal abuse

 

Become Familiar with Bullying Risk Factors

Understanding the risk factors of becoming a bully can help parents and coaches deter the behavior. Many bullies come from homes where such behavior is typical. There may also be domestic violence in the household.

Bullies often have a short fuse and a bad temper. They may use aggression to solve problems both on and off the field.

 

Being Proactive

Parents and coaches can be proactive at keeping bullying out of youth sports. Coaches can make themselves available to parents and players who need to report problem behavior. Parents can be open and honest with their children about reporting problems and setting good examples of how to treat others. Parents can also teach their children the zero-tolerance rule and not go along with others who are bullying.

Youth sports affords kids the opportunity to form strong relationships, be physically active and learn new skills. Eliminating bullying in youth sports requires that parents, coaches and the community work together to set positive examples, enforce a zero-tolerance policy and create an environment in which everyone is welcome.

 

ADHD & Focus, Focus Attention, Motivation, SYN Digital Enrollment Director

Helping Kids With ADHD Succeed In School

A child with ADHD doesn’t need to have difficulty in school. Here are five ways parents can help a child with ADHD succeed in school:

 

Create a routine for the child

Children with ADHD especially benefit from consistent structure.

Wake the child early enough so that mornings are not rushed. Allow time for a balanced breakfast and interacting with the family. Plan an after-school snacktime to refuel the child’s brain before tackling homework. Ensure that the child goes to bed early enough to get sufficient sleep.

 

Reinforce proper school time behavior

It is tempting to allow a child with ADHD to stand while doing homework and not do all the work at once or to zone out when he or she should be focused. However, it is important to replicate the school environment as closely as possible during homework time.

This reinforcement will help the child to understand what is expected of him or her at home and at school.

 

Be a resource, not a crutch

All kids need a little help with their homework every once in a while, but it is important to help and not hinder.

Doing a project for a child is hindering his or her learning. No matter how frustrated or distracted a child gets, it is important that he or she does homework mostly without parents’ assistance. Parents can help explain concepts and review work, but they should let the child work independently after that.

 

Reinforce appropriately

Parents should talk about how well a child solved a problem and praise the work and effort put into it. These are the things a child remembers when he or she works on another problem. It builds confidence and self–sufficiency.

 

Show that you are calm

Understand that children with and without ADHD can lose interest in lessons. Every kid gets a low grade every now and then. Parents should take a deep breath before reacting or getting too worried. This will also help the child not to overreact to a situation.

Parents are integral in helping a child with ADHD succeed in school. These steps will help such a child to be more successful in school.

 

Child Safety, Discipline, Motivation, SYN Digital Enrollment Director

Teaching Kids Responsibility

Parents want to help their kids be successful, but often fear they’ll teach them the wrong things, or teach them in the wrong way. Luckily, responsibility is something that can be taught by example and explanation as much as by enforcement of rules.

 

Learning Responsibility by Example

Parents are the best models for their child’s behavior, especially in the earliest years of development. They should express earnest interest in chores and go about their business without whining or frowning. Seeing shows of good humor alongside chores will help children associate responsibility with positive rather than negative feelings.

It is also beneficial to invite children to help with household chores and other responsibilities. This interaction helps them understand what to do, as well as reinforcing a positive aspect to the responsibility.

 

Learning Responsibility by Explanation

Kids want approval. They want to behave. They want to do well in the things their parents want them to do well in. If they act out or misbehave, there’s always a reason. Sometimes that reason is frustration born of the fact that they don’t know how to behave correctly.

That’s why explanations are so important. Sometimes it’s not enough to just show kids how to behave responsibly. Many times they don’t understand why a task is important, or perhaps even how to do that task correctly. In either case, explanations are crucial.

A child who not only understands how to do something, but why they should do it is a happy child. Children who misbehave, especially young ones, often don’t know why what they have done is wrong. If they learn how to correct their mistakes, they will most likely do so.

 

Learning Responsibility by Enforcement

Sometimes, of course, kids just won’t live up to the expectations placed upon them. At this point, parents must guide them to good behavior through enforcement of consequences for failures in responsibility.

Of course, parents should also make sure to give positive reinforcement for success. However, they should be wary of providing rewards too early on in a child’s development. Responsibility must be seen as an end in itself, not as an avenue to ulterior benefits.

 

In the End

Responsibility is a matter of modeling good behavior for one’s children. It is also a matter of explaining that behavior, and enforcing the consequences of that behavior, for better or for worse.

Discipline, Motivation, Self-Discipline, SYN Digital Enrollment Director

Is your child’s discipline problem a behavior issue or something else?

AutismAll children have moments or phases they go through where good discipline is hard to come by. It is a normal part of a child’s social development where they test and learn the boundaries of socially acceptable behavior.

But if you child is having prolonged and consistent discipline problems, there may be something at work that goes beyond parenting style or even the temperament of the child.

This article on Babble.com explores the possibility that your child’s discipline problems may actually be caused by a developmental disorder. 8 Signs It’s More Than a Discipline Problem.

Getting to the root cause of your child’s discipline issues will help both parent and child to better manage and control temper tantrums as well as address the true cause of the meltdowns.

 

Discipline, Motivation, SYN Digital Enrollment Director

Raising Tomorrow’s Leaders to Maintain High Morals & Integrity

It goes without saying that we live in a society that is known for having a blemished moral code. From general everyday crimes to large scale scandals and tales of corruption, ideals of honesty and integrity are usually just that-ideals; and often times fail to be enacted by most of society’s members. Considering this, adults in the role of nurturing and caring for young people should think seriously about how much emphasis they place on maintaining high standards of morality and integrity in the day to day lives of each child.

So much change can occur at the hands of these nurturers, and so much corruption as well.

If you find yourself in one of these roles and haven’t already set high moral standards in your home or school environment, now is the time. Below are a few simple tips on how to go about implanting seeds of fairness and honor in the minds of tomorrow’s leaders.

 

Effortless intervention

If you’re a busy parent or overloaded school teacher, the idea of setting aside time for yet another objective may seem like a shot in the dark. But one of the great things about good character is that it isn’t rocket science. For most of us it comes naturally, its ingredients are simple, and it can easily be replicated by young people.

One way to effortless teach children to have good character is to simply exhibit it yourself. Being cautious of your statements and actions and living up to your expectations of others (practice what you preach), can do wonders for the nurturing and development of the children you’re in contact with.

 

General guidelines for successful teaching

When working to better children’s understanding of the importance of honesty and upright character it’s important to be mindful of a few ground rules.

 

  • Be crystal clear about your expectations

This, above all, is one of the most important points to cover. In order for children to work towards an objective they need to know what that objective is. This means being clear about your values with regards to fairness, trustworthiness, respect, empathy and other honorable characteristics.

Likewise, doubt and indecisiveness are detrimental to this campaign. Children can often sense a shaky foundation a mile away. This makes it even more crucial to clarify and reiterate moral goals and objectives over time, as well as to demonstrate and uphold them every time an opportunity arises.

 

praise

 

  • Explain the personal and societal benefits of uprightness and good character

Along with clarifying your expectations it’s also important to explain your reasons for demanding such morality in the first place. Use interactive activities or interesting examples to illustrate to children the outcome of a moral and just society as well as the immediate rewards for good behavior. This may include being well-liked by others, trusted by teachers and friends, as well as being happy and content with one’s self.

 

  • Be consistent with penalties or demerits for immoral behavior

Show children that you are serious about the limits that you put in place by following up misbehavior with age appropriate repercussions. This may include demerits or punishments for large scale offenses such as cheating, stealing, and lying as well as reprimanding them for more subtle acts such as an unwillingness to compromise, share or show empathy towards others.

 

  • Encourage academic success without going overboard

The pressure to succeed and do well academically is often what pushes many children to cheat on exams and engage in other dishonest or immoral behavior in exchange for a higher mark or score. In retrospect, parents as well as teachers should also bear some of the burden of such actions. This is due to the often heavy emphasis they place on academic achievement and secular success.

Teach children that doing well in school is important for a successful career as well as their own enlightenment but that it’s not the ‘end all’ to everything. There are other ways to demonstrate intelligence outside of academic achievement and other options besides college. And primarily that they should try to aim for a well-balanced life-with regards to school, family, work and leisure activities.

These are just a few issues to consider when working to instill high moral standards in children.

In addition to any workbooks or activities that you may find to assist you in this endeavor, remember that one of the easiest and most important first steps is to simply apply these values to your own life first and foremost.

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This is a guest post by Martha Buckly, she is a blogger and writer since very long time. She loves to travel and to make new experiences. Martha is currently collaborating with few writing services because she wants to share her knowledge about writing with others.

Fitness, Motivation, SYN Digital Enrollment Director

Fun Activities That my Girls Actually Want to Do

Emily, guest contributor

There is this awful and horrible fact that you have to face when you are a mother of two girls: they are becoming teenagers and you are not the center of their world anymore.

Yes, you will stop being that fun mom, and that person that brings the smile and excitement to their faces, just by showing up in their room. Less and less common activities and less and less time will be given to you. You are ceasing to be the main superstar of their lives. But you can still grab some attention from your teenage girls, if you think hard and come up with some fun activities that you can do together with them.

 

Make a Fashion Show or Photo Session

Everybody nowadays has a smartphone with a great camera. Your girls will always want to go shopping, but besides that, they will also want to look good. You don’t have to spend a ton of money shopping each time you want to spend some time with them. Organize your own fashion show or photo shooting during which they will be models. This is a great way to reorganize the closet as well.

 

Organize the Movie Night

Just watching a movie together is fine too, but make it a real movie night. Spend some time together, looking for movies to watch and rearrange the living room into a real cinema. Don’t forget the snacks and drinks. If you like and have a time, show you kids how to make snacks and bake them yourselves. In this way, you will have a whole day of preparations and activities so that you get two more extra hours, watching a nice movie. Choose the films together and prepare some tissues if it’s a sad movie!

 

Organize Your Own Spa Day at Home

Make your home men-free and have your daughters enjoy the day with you in a spa that you will make from your home. This includes preparing all sorts of facial and body scrubs, a lot of nail polish, home-made masks and many other fun things. There are tons of recipes online that show you how to prepare all these things at home. Also, this is a great way to spend time mixing up ingredients and pampering your daughters. Not to mention, this makes a perfect opportunity to show your girls how to take care of themselves and how to indulge themselves while making themselves beautiful at the same time.

 

Prepare a Meal

Now, this is a tricky one. At first, it may sound too much like a chore to your girls. Therefore, you have to make it look fun. Do it by beginning with their favorite meal and with making the whole thing more interesting by having rules like: “cook, but everybody has to dance/sing.” In this way, they will be more interested and they might just end up learning something.

Eating out is also very fun. All girls love to dress up so they can show up in public and show everyone just how beautiful they are. Fishing for good deals in local restaurants can often inspire you to try out a new place you haven’t been to, and you have a reason to get all dolled up as a family!

Be careful with too much food though, you want your kids healthy!

Whatever you do, try to make it look fun and interesting. Their childhood ends so fast, so make sure you make the most of it.

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Emily is a mother of two beautiful daughters. She and her husband do everything they can to ensure the safety of their kids.

Discipline, Motivation, Self-Esteem, SYN Digital Enrollment Director

6 Signs You’re Forgetting to Set a Good Example for Your Kids

Melanie Hargrave, guest contributor

Being a parent gives you an abundance of parenting components to think about and remember, so naturally many good practices may fall through the cracks. But one of the most important responsibilities that cannot be overlooked by a parent is to constantly set a good example. Here are some signs that you may need to change your habits to not only improve your child’s outlook, but also yourself as a person.

 

You’re Eating Badly

Your eating habits will leave an impression on your children, whether or not you eat the same foods together. Eating too late and eating sugary or fatty food will imply that children will be able to indulge in those habits when they are older. Be sure to eat foods that are wholesome for both of you. If you are the one protecting them from your own bad eating habits now, who will protect them in the future?

 

You Don’t Do Housework

Depending on what kind of household you live in, you might have a maid or other help come in to assist you with housework. If your children never see you working, they may get a skewed view of how life is supposed to work as an adult. Make sure you set a chore schedule for the family. Try to make the work fun by operating together as a group.

 

You’re Inactive

It’s not just your body and mental health you’re affecting by neglecting to exercise. Children have plenty of energy to put toward being active, but the less active you are with them the more that energy will dwindle away. Help your children find sports or hobbies to fall in love with now, so that they’ll start good habits and keep them throughout their lives.

 

You Shirk Obligations

We’ve all had that party we were planning on going to, but decided not to at the last minute because we were too tired. If your child witnesses this kind of flakiness, it will permanently skew the way they view commitments to others. The next time you or your child feels the desire to shirk an obligation, verbalize your thought process. “Well, I’m tired, and I’d rather stay at home and play. But I made a promise and I can’t break promises.”

 

Bad-Date

 

You’re in a Bad Relationship

This is a controversial topic, but it depends on what you want for your children. Most feel that the foundation of a family is most important for child development, but to others the relationship between mother and father must be positive for it to do any good. Make sure you are being treated well if you want your children to succeed in their future relationships. If you are stuck in a toxic relationship, consider whether your children’s futures are at stake if you can’t end the relationship for yourself.

 

You Choose Not to Be Happy

Children are happy creatures, but they also learn quickly. Life as an adult is much harder than it is as a child, but you may want to reevaluate the way you approach it. Happiness is so much about attitude that you should ensure you’re looking at life as positively as possible — if not for yourself, for the sake of your child. Have conversations with them, talk about everything that is going well, and teach them to look for the beauty in life. You will prepare them with valuable tools for the rest of their lives, and you will learn a valuable lesson yourself in the meantime.

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Melanie Hargrave is a wife and homemaker whose pride and joy is her family. In addition to spending time with her husband and daughters, she loves being outdoors, playing sports, and sharing her experiences with others. She is an advocate for women’s rights, and supports Dr. Jeffrey D. Hoefflin and his services for women.

Discipline, Motivation, SYN Digital Enrollment Director

Helping Children Avoid Winter Blues

Barbara Johnson, guest contributor

As fun as winter can be for your child, it can also be a source of bad moods and negative behavior. The gloomy, snowy days can take a toll on both you and your child. However, there are a few things you can do to help your child combat the winter blues and even perk up your own mood along the way. Take note, though, if you are concerned that your child may be suffering from more than just a few gloomy days and has seasonal affective disorder (SAD) seek out professional medical attention.

 

Do Activities Together

Sometimes all your child needs is a little distraction to get their mind off of the sad weather and dark interior. Don’t limit yourself to playing board games and watching television though. This is time spent together but it isn’t always quality.

Find some crafts that you can try together and make your own holiday decorations. You can also play some active games indoors that will help spend some of that pent-up energy. Go on a scavenger hunt that leads to a movie theater themed evening indoors. Or test out a new cookie recipe with your child’s help. Share your treats with neighbors or friends. One of these activities can easily take up one afternoon.

 

Play Outside

Just because there’s snow on the ground doesn’t mean that you can’t have outdoor adventures. In fact, it’s all the more reason to get out there, especially if you live in an area where snow is a rare commodity.

It can be a pain to bundle your child up just to discover they need to use the bathroom or they want to come inside after ten minutes. But if you can make it part of your routine to go outside a couple of times a week, you will surely notice the difference in your child. The cool, fresh air will do them good. Part of the problem with winter blues is feeling cooped up in one place for too long.

 

Get Out of the House

Winter driving is frightening for some people. But with a little preparation and courage, you can get out of the house for the afternoon and save your family some sanity. Sometimes all you need to cheer up your young one is a change of scenery.

Doing a fun family activity like ice skating, sledding, getting hot chocolate, or looking at Christmas lights is a good way to escape your home but keep everyone together. Noticing the fun aspects of winter and celebrating the cold can be a way to help your child’s mood improve.

 

Let the Sun In

A very real cause of seasonal affective disorder is lack of sunlight. Keep your own home bright and cheery to contrast the cloudy skies outside. Use lighting that brings a room to life, rather than dimmer, low lighting.

For an even better experience, find ways to let in the sun. Install overhead roof windows while the weather will still allow it. Open up your blinds and let the sun pour in (this is an excellent way to warm your house as well). Wherever you live, find a way to utilize the natural light from the sun. Canadians who experience less sunlight during the day will want to invest in glass doors for Vancouver homes or larger windows for Edmonton.

Your child’s mental health should be a high priority to you. It will be worth it to both of you if you make the extra effort to help them have a more enjoyable winter. Work together to overcome and avoid the winter blues that afflict so many people.

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Barbara Johnson works in real estate and enjoys finding her clients the perfect homes. In addition, she shares her home improvement and gardening tips with others through blogging.